cadaver day

(Picture unrelated to the post. This is a harmless cerebellum slide seen beneath a microscope.)

          The day started with a mass held in honor of our cadavers. Afterwards, we all gathered outside the anatomy lab for the blessing ceremony. "I'm prepared to see the body," said Dia as we lined up outside, "Just not the face." I felt the same way. I don't know what it is, but seeing a dead person's face is just so different from seeing a dead person's arm or leg. Extremities belong to bodies, but faces belong to people.
         
         Before I knew it, it was my group's turn to enter. I breathed in and walked calmly, taking in the sight of twenty dead humans. They were invisible - beneath the blue sheets, all we could see of them were the outlines of their head, feet, breast, and knees. Each one was a different size and shape from the other. As my group gathered around Cadaver #3, I could see that he or she looked a little smaller than the rest. Perhaps it was a child. Mikha surmised that he was a male because of the flat chest, but I really have no way of knowing yet.

        And so we all gathered around our respective cadavers, candles lit, voices hushed. The priest, who was also a doctor, went around and flecked holy water on each body. Then Dr. Jocson told us to unsheath the face. Dia and I looked at each other briefly, panicked. But she, being nearest to the head, calmly peeled back the blue sheet.

       The smell was the first thing to hit me. I was not expecting it. I thought that bodies only reeked once they were actually sliced open, but as soon as the head was exposed, I smelled something like expired bread. It wasn't a terrible smell; it was just a little sour. Rap would later describe it to me as sweet. I guess formalin smells different for everybody.

      The second thing that hit me was a wave of relief, because Number Three's head was still wrapped in a white shroud. Like a mummy, with no face exposed. But his or her shoulders were bare, and they looked thin, shriveled, and dark brown.

      We then took turns saying a prayer - or a thought, or a nod - for Number Three. We each said something different, but we still ended up saying the same thing: thank you.

      Thank you, Cadaver #3, whoever you were in your past life. We grieve over whatever misfortune led to your becoming an unclaimed body in a hospital morgue. You were once someone's parent, brother, sister, lover. But now you will be our greatest teacher. We promise to always treat you with the respect that you deserve.

      This morning was just the blessing. Dissection begins next week. We snuffed out our candles, placed the flowers at our cadavers' feet, and filed out of the room in a formalin daze.